A benefactor is an individual who supports one in kind or cash. It could, however, be shocking to learn that one’s helper could go to the extent of having an affair with one’s spouse. Does this mean that the benefactor is now reaping from his ‘sowing?’ Based on this, SATURDAY PUNCH sought some Nigerians’ opinions on what they would do if they found their spouses in bed with their benefactors
I’ll fight my benefactor till she leaves my spouse – Seun Ogunfolaji
It is a two-way thing — if my benefactor does not know my husband before, I will let her know that he is mine not hers, while we settle the case amicably. But if otherwise, then that is double trouble. I will fight her and make sure she leaves my husband instantly, not minding what she has done for me. I will be so dramatic with her and she won’t like or wait to see what will happen to her. As for my husband, we will settle the case and I will let him know that he has cheated on me and I will show my anger.
I will employ God’s wisdom – Wale Ayodele
I will employ God’s wisdom to identify what went wrong in the first place and how they got to meet each other. But I have nothing to do with that benefactor because that has already ended the relationship between us, not minding what he has done for me. I will be so disappointed in him. My wife is not worth sharing with anybody. I would rather sit my wife down and let her understand why it is not good for her to do that, but if she persists, that will lead to the end of our marriage.
I’ll keep my mind at rest – Fausat Adeosun
Well, experience has taught me so many things because this could lead to a break-up or loss of life. I will accept it as my own cross. In fact, it has happened to me before. My husband brought a woman to our matrimonial home. I didn’t do anything; I just kept quiet; but today my husband sees me as a god. A good woman like me will keep her mind at rest instead of giving myself hypertension because of a man. Any man that does that will surely stop such acts one day and remember home just like my husband did.
Women can’t be trusted at all – Cristian Anyanagu
I would show my annoyance seeing that because it will be so painful. But if my wife is remorseful, I could choose to forgive her while our marriage goes on. But if not, I would divorce her and marry another wife. The Bible has made me understand that only on the basis of adultery should I divorce my wife and marry another one. But first, I would forgive both of them.
My benefactor will take care of me too – Kafayat Jimoh
She will take care of both of us. I can’t fight, but the only thing is that she can marry my husband and take care of me too. That is the only remedy. She is allowed to marry my husband so far they love each other. There is no point killing myself because men will always be men. In fact, I will not fight my husband but he must always be responsible to me and my children.
I will get another wife – Olaoluwa Wale
What an insult! I will instantly forget all he has done for me and my family. I will be so crossed with the man and as for my wife, she has to follow the man because I don’t know what she would have seen in him other than fame or money. My wife would leave my children and follow the man. I will not allow her to take a pin out of my house. I will send her packing and get another wife. She has got nothing to do with me again.
I can’t kill myself – Funke Olaleye
Men could be so reckless and they can go to any length to get what they want. I will only be more prayerful to God to fight on my behalf. I can’t kill myself because of a man. If I die today, he is ready to have another wife immediately. It is not by my power, but God’s grace to just let it go, I will be surprised at both of them, but then, there is nothing I would do but forgive and let peace reign. If I divorce my husband now, do I know what another one I meet will do?
That’ll be the end of our marriage – Onyedikachi Sunday
It means I don’t have any business with her again; she just has to go by fire and by force. All I will do is to get a witness to what has happened by involving her family and mine before I send her away so that I will not be called a wicked man. That will be the end of our marriage; it means she has no regard for me. It is so embarrassing. She must go. It has shown that my wife does not need me again. She will go back to her father’s house.
I’ll leave it to God to fight – Bola Adeniyi
I will be very surprised at first and ask myself, ‘what kind of thing is this?’ I will just feel like hitting both of them with something, but what happens afterwards? I will leave the fight to God because that is the best thing to do in the circumstance. Will I now kill myself because of that? I would rather live my life. I will not even behave as if I saw them because there is nothing new under the earth.
I may divorce her – Akinlotan Sunkanmi
I will not do anything at first; I would just walk away, while I decide on the kind of mental torture I will use against her to kick her out of my life. For any reason, I will not raise my hands against her because I don’t want to kill anyone. At times when one overreacts, it could lead to jail. I am sure the heavens will be angry with me if I continue to be her husband after the act. I might not necessarily divorce her; it depends on her reactions.
Source: PUNCH